🎙 Volume UP

Season 24: Lost & Found | Guest: James Luginbyhl

What happens when life turns down the volume on everything you thought mattered most?

For James Luginbyhl, the loss wasn't simply a marriage or a custody battle. It was the life he imagined sharing with his two daughters.

After what James describes as an awful divorce and an even more difficult custody battle, multiple attorneys advised him to walk away from the fight for custody of his girls.

How does a father make peace with a future he never wanted?

Season 24 of Other People's Shoes, Lost & Found, explores what happens when we lose something deeper than possessions identity, purpose, hope, direction, faith, or the life we thought we would have and what we discover as we begin finding our way forward.

For James, the journey through loss led him toward forgiveness, grace, a renewed understanding of his faith, and something he hadn't expected to find.

His voice.

In "Volume UP," we explore fatherhood, masculinity, marriage, and the difference between offering someone a handout and extending a hand to help them stand again.

And James shares three powerful words he believes every daughter needs to hear from her father.

Sometimes finding your voice doesn't mean speaking louder.

Sometimes it means finally discovering what matters enough to say.

🧭 GUEST INTRODUCTION

James A. Luginbyhl is a Texas writer, author of Hymns for the Unfinished: A Memoir of Grief and Becoming, and host of the Christian faith podcast CREDO.

Raised in West Texas, James grew up with ideas about strength, responsibility, and what it means to be a man. But life would eventually challenge many of those understandings.

Through the heartbreak of divorce, separation from the everyday lives of his daughters, and a difficult journey toward forgiveness, James began examining what it truly means to live with faith, love with intention, and find grace in circumstances he could not change.

His writing and podcast explore the intersection of grief, Christianity, masculinity, fatherhood, and the unfinished work of becoming who we are meant to be.

James isn't interested in pretending life has been easy or that faith provides simple answers.

He's interested in what happens when we stop hiding behind those answers and begin speaking honestly about the life we've actually lived.

🧭 EPISODE DETAILS

In "Volume UP," Neil and James explore:

💔 When the life you imagined disappears: James reflects on a painful divorce, an exhausting custody battle, and the devastating experience of being advised by multiple attorneys to walk away from the fight.

👨‍👧‍👧 A father's love through loss: What happens when the relationship you imagined having with your children no longer looks the way you hoped?

🌵 The West Texas influence: How James's upbringing shaped his understanding of masculinity, responsibility, strength, and the man he believed he was supposed to become.

🙏 Finding faith in the aftermath: How forgiveness, grace, and his relationship with God became part of a new chapter after profound personal loss.

🚀 A lid or a launch pad: James introduces a striking image about marriage and the influence a wife can have on her husband's growth. Are our closest relationships helping us become who we're meant to be, or holding us back?

🤝 A hand up, not just a handout: Why helping someone rise can be different from simply giving them something, and how dignity, compassion, and genuine connection change the way we serve others.

🧔 Is masculinity becoming endangered? James challenges the way society talks about men and considers what healthy masculinity might look like when strength includes vulnerability, responsibility, compassion, and faith.

🎙 Finding the courage to turn the volume up: How losing so much of the life he knew eventually helped James discover a voice he could use to share his experiences and encourage others.

🗣 Three words every daughter needs to hear: James reveals three powerful words he believes fathers should say to their daughters—and why those words matter.

👟 What it means to be found: James's story invites us to consider whether the things we've lost must define us, or whether the lessons we discover along the way can help us become someone new.

And beneath this entire conversation sits a question:

When life takes away the future you thought was yours, can you still find the courage to turn up the volume on the life you have left?

🧭 MEMORABLE TAKEAWAY

A lid or a launch pad.

It's a powerful image James brings into this conversation about marriage and the influence we have on the people closest to us.

Our relationships can shape what we believe about ourselves. They can make us feel smaller, or they can create room for us to grow.

But James's story also reminds us that our lives do not have to remain defined by the people, circumstances, or losses that once left us feeling powerless.

Sometimes finding our voice means learning to forgive.

Sometimes it means extending a hand instead of passing judgment.

And sometimes it means discovering that being a strong man isn't about never falling. It's about what we choose to do when we're trying to stand again.

You may not get to rewrite what happened to you. But you can discover a different way to speak about what happens next.

Maybe that's what it really means to turn the volume up.

🧭 CONNECT WITH JAMES LUGINBYHL

🌐 James Luginbyhl | Official Website

🎙 CREDO | James Luginbyhl's Podcast

📖 Hymns for the Unfinished | Learn About James's Memoir

Explore James's writing, his reflections on faith and fatherhood, and the questions he continues asking about grief, grace, and becoming.

Thank you, James, for being willing to share the painful parts of your journey, challenge our understanding of masculinity, and remind us that finding our voice can begin in the very places where we once felt silenced.

🧭 LISTEN & FOLLOW OTHER PEOPLE'S SHOES

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Subscribe to Other People's Shoes wherever you listen to podcasts and continue walking with us through Season 24: Lost & Found.

Every story is an invitation to look closer, listen longer, and see life from a different perspective.

🧭 LEAVE YOUR FOOTPRINT

Did "Volume UP" change the way you think about fatherhood, forgiveness, or finding your voice?

Every story leaves an impression. We'd love to know what this conversation left with you.

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